It all started with a garish lime-green dragon costume—the kind of neon shade that only a child could love. I tried my best to coax her into the suitably poofy Snow White dress as we browsed the Halloween aisle at Walmart, but she clung to the lime-green dragon costume with the iron grip of a determined toddler, convinced it was hers. Thus, I was convinced too. 

And so, we arrived at Skitts Mountain Farm in Cleveland, Georgia, on a warm October afternoon with a tiny baby dragon. I regretted my choice to wear the Kiel James Patrick sweater as the weather neared 85, but felt determined to make it worth the splurge. Maple, too, seemed to momentarily regret the thick fabric of her costume, but she quickly forgot the heat as we pushed her stroller past a line of densely foliaged oaks and into the wide, open expanse of Skitts Mountain  Farm. 

Friendly Faces and Simple Pleasures 

The enterprise rests among gently sloping hills, its landscape dotted with fields of vibrant flowers cultivated with whimsical intentionality. Thin, unobtrusive tree lines frame the grounds, guiding the eye toward a sprawling lake that mirrors the tranquility of the setting. The farm offers an experience rich in under-stimulating yet wholesome fun, designed to engage boys, girls, and children of all ages in a screen-free escape. 

Skitts Mountain Farm strikes me as an idyllic, nostalgic escape from the relentless pressures of modern life. It recreates the charm of a quaint Edwardian-era festival, filled with friendly faces, leisurely activities, and simple pleasures—a stark contrast to the stress and strain of Monday mornings. Here, in the soft light of an autumn afternoon, people pause to enjoy life instead of racing through it. 

Maple, the small dragon, meanders down the pleasant path until she comes face to face with her greatest terror—the only beast capable of striking fear into such a brave dragon—two alpacas. Their vacant gazes drift past her, staring aimlessly into the pasture, but Maple feels certain it’s an ancient glare of antipathy, laced with a curse. She dodges it by clinging tightly to her papa’s chest. Close call. Next, we visit the far less intimidating (though still benighted) guinea pigs, whom Maple distrusts before deciding they pose no immediate threat. As parents, we decide to cut our losses and leave the petting zoo, a clean and enjoyable stop along the circular path of the farm.

We pass the Cow Train and pipe slides, deciding to save those attractions for when Maple gets older. Instead, we linger at the Jump Pillows, where I hold the giggling baby dragon as we bounce gently across the surface. She screams joyfully, and Papa snaps several photos of her wide, sweet smile.

The Maze Phase

After the excitement of the Jump Pillows, we took a moment to rest and watched passively as families played on the inflatables and go-carts before we traversed the corn maze. I can’t quite articulate the appeal of a corn maze, yet it captivates generations of thrill-seekers during the autumn months. Why is it such an exhilarating thrill, and to some a dizzying aphrodisiac? What is it about the burnt, bleached stalks of corn that replenish our depleted stores of serotonin without the need for a prescription? That question may be best suited for the philosophers, but my family and I had a blast navigating the maze, easily pushing the little dragon’s stroller through the winding lanes of corn as she shouted, an inspired mantra of “CORN!” 

Our next maze unfolded into a fantasy of zinnias bursting in a riot of color. Parents paused in the little circular alcoves, capturing photographs of their own dragons, fairy princesses, and overall-clad children as they beg them to sit still and refrain from picking the flowers. Take nothing, leave nothing, folks! 

A Show of Strength 

The hit show Bluey provides a perfect example of parenting a strong-willed child through the prism of Muffin, the lead protagonist’s cousin. Muffin’s spirited personality often challenges her parents and friends, showcasing the ups and downs of navigating her feisty nature. Maple captured Big Muffin energy as we approached a small circle formed by hay bales, filled with brightly colored hippity hops. The moment she spotted them, she shouted, “Ball!”—another intellectual proclamation worthy of a toddler genius. With a determined wriggle from our arms, she summoned her strong legs and a fierce will to scale the hay bales, entering the baby arena. Though it wasn’t an arena, in the mind of our little dragon, she prepared for battle.

We watched in astonishment as she boldly attempted to pry the balls from the hands of much bigger children, claiming them as her own to bring glory and honor to our family. Alas, her quest met with the gentle admonition “No, Maple, be a sweet girl.” But she had no desire to be a sweet girl; she sought to amass a horde of colorful balls like a tiny Smaug. After a brief moment of chaos, Papa escorted her from the arena for a photo shoot by the Skitts sign, where she posed proudly before resting in her stroller, sipping water while he practiced the hammer game—he reminds me presently to mention that he hit the bell each time.

In this game of thrones, it seemed clear: you win, or you die. We considered the hayride next, but by this point, Maple was flagging, and she still needed to select her pumpkin.

The Great Pumpkin

The time had finally come to select our pumpkin. We passed a smooth pond and groves of colorful trees, admiring the underrated Northeast Georgia landscape. As we neared the abundant pumpkin patch, overflowing with gourds of all shapes, colors, and sizes, we set out to find the perfect seasonal gourd to complement our family schema. Which lucky vegetable would decorate our doorway this year before we gutted, cut, and carved it into a whimsical expression to delight the neighborhood children?

We unlatched Maple, letting her sit in the grass as we brought her pumpkin after pumpkin, each one rejected in turn with the air of an unsatisfied princess.

Finally, she began to really look around, her eyes drawn immediately to the largest pumpkin in the patch. I kid you not—she pointed and shouted, “THAT!” I explained that it was much too big, expecting a price tag of over one hundred dollars. However, my husband decided to ask the attendants about the price, and we were floored by the entirely affordable cost. This gentlemanly nature of pricing ensured our loyalty for years to come—no weighing and no price gouging; It was a classy move and showed that they respect their customers.

 Conclusion

In conclusion, Skitts Farm offers a memorable fall retreat that transcends the traditional pumpkin patch experience, transforming it into an all-inclusive autumn resort. With its engaging activities and family-friendly atmosphere, it invites visitors to immerse themselves in the season’s delights. So, gather your loved ones and escape to Skitts Mountain Farm this fall—where the joy of the season awaits you in every corner.

In the words of Baby Maple (probably), “It puts the dino-ROAR in dino-SAUR.”